Dear Webby's Humor Letter
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Good Morning, !
Today is Friday, December 13
Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops!


Friday, December 13. Keep in mind that being 
suterstitious brings bad luck!

____________________________________________________
Today, December 13 in 
1577 Five ships under the command of Sir Francis Drake left
Plymouth, England, to embark on Drake's circumnavigation of the
globe. The journey took almost three years.  

______________________________________________________
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Today's Bonehead Award: 3-year-old given meth, sedative before she was murdered _______________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! _______________________________________________ Write a wise saying and your name will live forever. --- Author unknown _______________________________________________ A little girl asked her mother, "How did the human race come about?" The mother answered: "God made Adam and Eve and they had children and so all mankind was made." Two days later she asks her father the same question. The father answered: "Many years ago there were monkeys, and we developed from them." The confused girl returns to her mother and says: "Mom, how is it possible that you told me that the human race was created by God and Papa says we developed from monkeys?" The mother answers: "Well dear, it is very simple. I told you about the origin of my side of the family, and your father told you about his side." ________________________________________________` James Anthony Baxter Split Rock Lighthouse, Two Harbors, MN ____________________________________________________
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___________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Patrick Stallworth, 39, Derick Brown, 29, Birmingham, Alabama 3-year-old given meth, sedative before she was murdered An autopsy found that the body of Kamille "Cupcake" McKinney, the 3-year-old Alabama girl who was found dead in a dumpster after she was kidnapped from a birthday party, was given methamphetamine and a sedative before she was murdered, according to reports. Prosecutors stated Tuesday during a preliminary hearing for Patrick Stallworth, 39, that he and his girlfriend, Derick Brown, 29, used candy to lure Kamille away from the birthday party on Oct. 12 and kidnap her, ABC Birmingham affiliate WBMA reported. Birmingham Police detective Jonathan Ross testified that he spoke to a 10-year-old at the birthday party who said he saw a man and woman in an SUV handing out candy and that he saw Kamille in the SUV crying, according to WBMA.
DearWebby's Tech Support Pits From: Sharon Re: List of motels that allow pets Dear Webby Is there a site that lists pet friendly motels along the way? I do not relish the thought of sleeping in the car with my dog while everyone else is inside sleeping in a bed. I'd sure appreciate your or your readers help on this problem. Thank you, Sharon Dear Sharon As long a it's not a yappy Chihuahua or similar dog that might annoy all the other guests, most motels nowadays allow small dogs and working dogs. Larger dogs are a bit of a problem. Even if the motel has a "Pets Welcome" sign, if the dogs drool, slobber, shed, or look like they might scare somebody into running through the new rose hedge, then the Vacancy sign suddenly changes to NO Vacancy until after you have gone away. If you are not sure how your dog will behave during the inspection in the motel or hotel lobby, then it would be a good idea to talk to your vet and discuss medication. Keeping those basic rules in mind, here is a site that They also list B&B's and cabins. If enough people find this link useful, I'll put it permanently into the left side margin. Pets Welcome Have FUN! DearWebby
Automatically move ALL your settings and programs.
Bill was attending an outdoor music concertwith a young woman he had recently begun dating. Standing at the back of the crowd, they wrapped their arms around each other, swaying to the music. After a particularly romantic song, his date turned to face him. With a loving smile, she said, "I wish we were closer..." Totally thrilled, he looked into her eyes and whispered, "Do you mean our houses or our friendship?" Puzzled, she replied, "No, you dummy! ...To the stage."
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
After four years of separation, my wife and I finally divorced amicably. I wanted to date again, but I had no idea of how to start, so I decided to look in the personals column of the local newspaper. After reading through all the listings, I circled three that seemed possible in terms of age and interest, but I put off calling them. Two days later, there was a message on my answering machine from my ex-wife. "I came over to your house to borrow some tools today and saw the ads you circled in the paper. Don't call the one in the second column. That's me. And don't call the last one. That's my receptionist. She's a silly bimbo. You can do a lot better than that!"
What's the Heirloom Christmas Book about? It is a BIG e-book with all the stories, that your great grandmother recited or read to your grandmother, when she was a kid. I want these stories to be preserved. You may know what it is about, when somebody mentions "bittersweet love like in 'The Gift Of The Magi'," but with today's education, your kids or even their teachers, probably don't know. So I collected these classics and put them all together into one e-book. This book of Christmas Stories is a cultural treasure, that should be passed on to our descendants. Since it is in e-book format, you can put it onto a CD for each kid, and fill the rest of the CD with family pictures and other keepsakes, making it a true heirloom. I have produced a smaller version last year. This final edition has more stories and illustrations, but I kept the price down to the same $10. The Heirloom Christmas Book also makes a nice Christmas gift! Click on the book cover to get your copy or click on Heirloom Christmas Book http://webby.com/cb You can download it and give the file as a gift! ___________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Thriftyfun.com Cookie Exchanges for New Parents By Donna While making my cookies for my family cookie exchange, I decided to put these together for my daughter, who is pregnant with twins! I happened to have regular and small cookie cutters of gingerbread figures and just wanted to give anyone with children or pregnant the idea that they can do so as well! Cute for a Mom's, dads or parents group too and nice for stockings! Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here: ThriftyFun ____________________________________________________
Oldest still street legal car is 125 years old
___________________________________________________ A few years ago, as a solar eclipse approached, some planetarium directors in Southern California sent out warnings to the community about the eclipse. They warned people not to look directly into the sun. The planetarium received an indignant letter from a local resident. She said that if an eclipse was so dangerous, they never should have decided to hold one and ought to cancel it. ___________________________________________________ As a realtor, I deal with all types of people. Recently, I showed a home to a couple who seemed eager to check out the fantastic view from the living room. But when I dramatically pulled back the drapes, the disappointed husband asked, "Where is the view? Those mountains must be blocking it." ___________________________________________________ A walker exploring the delights of the Isle of Mull lost his way in the mist and wandered around aimlessly for three days. At last, the mist rose slightly and he saw a man in the distance. "Help" he cried and stumbled towards the man who waited for him to reach him. "Whit's the matter" said the local man. "I'm lost and I've been wandering around for three days" replied the hiker. "Is there a reward out for ye, dae ye think?" asked the local. The walker said he didn't think there would be. "In that case, you're still lost" said the local and faded into the mist. __________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
___________________________________________________

Today, December 12 in
Today December 13 in
1577 Five ships under the command of Sir Francis Drake left
Plymouth, England, to embark on Drake's circumnavigation of the
globe. The journey took almost three years. 

1636 The United States National Guard was created when militia
regiments were organized by the General Court of the
Massachusetts Bay Colony. 

1642 New Zealand was discovered by Dutch navigator Abel Tasman.


1809 The first abdominal surgical procedure was performed in
Danville, KY, on Jane Todd Crawford. The operation was
performed without an anesthetic. 

1816 John Adamson received a patent for a dry dock. 

1862 In America, an estimated 11,000 Northern soldiers were
killed or wounded when Union forces were defeated by
Confederates under General Robert E. Lee, at the Battle of
Fredericksburg. 

1883 The border between Ontario and Manitoba was established. 

1884 Percy Everitt received a patent for the first coin-
operated weighing machine. 

1913 It was announced by authorities in Florence, Italy, that
the "Mona Lisa" had been recovered. The work was stolen from
the Louvre Museum in Paris in 1911. 

1921 Britain, France, Japan and the United States signed the
Pacific Treaty. 

1937 Japanese forces took the Chinese city of Nanking
(Nanjing). An estimated 200,000 Chinese were killed over the
next six weeks. The event became known as the "Rape of
Nanking." 

1944 During World War II, the U.S. cruiser Nashville was badly
damaged in a Japanese kamikaze suicide attack. 138 people were
killed in the attack. 

1964 In El Paso, TX, President Johnson and Mexican President
Gustavo Diaz Ordaz set off an explosion that diverted the Rio
Grande River, reshaping the U.S.-Mexican border. This ended a
century-old border dispute. 

1981 Authorities in Poland imposed martial law in an attempt to
crack down on the Solidarity labor movement. Martial law ended
formally in 1983. 

1982 The Sentry Armored Car Company in New York discovered that
$11 million had been stolen from its headquarters overnight.
It
was the biggest cash theft in U.S. history. 

1987 U.S. Secretary of State George Shultz told reporters in
Copenhagen, Denmark, that the Reagan administration would begin
making funding requests for the proposed Star Wars defense
system. 

1988 A bankruptcy judge in Columbia, SC, ordered the assets of
the troubled PTL television ministry sold to a Toronto real
estate developer for $65 million. 

1989 South African President F.W. de Klerk met for the first
time with imprisoned African National Congress leader Nelson
Mandela, at de Klerk's office in Cape Town. 

1991 Five Central Asian republics of the Soviet Union agreed to
join the new Commonwealth of Independent States. 

1991 North Korea and South Korea signed a historic non-
aggression agreement. 

1993 The U.S. Supreme Court ruled that people must receive a
hearing before property linked to illegal drug sales can be
seized. 

1994 An American Eagle commuter plane carrying 20 people
crashed short of Raleigh-Durham International Airport in North
Carolina, killing 15 people. 

1995 China's most influential democracy activist, Wei
Jingsheng, who already had spent 16 years in prison, was
sentenced to 14 more years. 

1998 Puerto Rican voters rejected U.S. statehood in a non-
binding referendum. 

2000 U.S. Vice President Al Gore conceded the 2000 Presidential
election to Texas Gov. George W. Bush. The Florida electoral
votes were won by only 537 votes, which decided the election.
The election had been contested up to the U.S. Supreme Court,
which said that the Florida recount (supported by the Florida
Supreme Court) was unconstitutional. 

2000 Seven convicts, the "Texas 7," escaped from Connally Unit
in Kenedy, TX, southeast of San Antonio, by overpowering
civilian workers and prison employees. They fled with stolen
clothing, pickup truck and 16 guns and ammunition. 

2001 The U.S. government released a video tape that showed
Osama bin Laden and others discussing their knowledge of the
terrorist attacks on the United States on September 11, 2001. 

2001 U.S. President George W. Bush served formal notice to
Russia that the United States was withdrawing from the 1972
Anti-Ballistic Missile Treaty. 

2001 Israel severed all contact with Yasser Arafat. Israel also
launched air strikes and sent troops into Palestine in
response
to a bus ambush that killed 10 Israelis. 

2001 Gunmen stormed the Indian Parliament and killed seven
people and injured 18. Security forces killed the attackers
during a 90-minute gunbattle. 

2001 NBC-TV announced that it would begin running hard liquor
commercials. NBC issued a 19-point policy that outlined the
conditions for accepting liquor ads. 

2001 Michael Frank Goodwin was arrested and booked on two
counts of murder, one count of conspiracy and three special
circumstances (lying in wait, murder for financial gain and
multiple murder) in connection to the death of Mickey Thompson.
Thompson and his wife Trudy were shot to death in their
driveway on March 16, 1988. Thompson, known as the "Speed
King," set nearly 500 auto speed endurance records including
being the first person to travel more than 400 mph on land. 

2019  smiled.
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